So....I just got a phone call. A phone call about the problems going on with a friend and their marriage. Marriage!  How can I  forget about all the relationships around me? I have watched a friend struggle through a nasty divorce and gracefully come out on the other side, but it was not easy. Now I have several friends and family struggling with their marriages. I have always been interested in marriage and family in terms of social norms, but as it hits home and I start looking up more and more research on marriage; it is scary. Half of all marriages will end in divorce, one third of all marriages will face infidelity, and sadly enough most marriages fail within seven years (give or take two years). I say all this because we need to step into marriage knowing that is it work! Hard work! It is not a simple next step...it is a committment. It takes time and communication and no marriage is perfect because we are humans and we are not perfect. In discussing this with a friend, my marriage was compared to the perfect marriage and while I thank them for the compliment I really want to tell them all the things/issues we have made it through. We were young when we got married. I had just turned 21 and Landon had just turned 22. We were both in school with jobs that paid next to nothing and while we had some help our decisions were not necessarily smiled upon. I can say that I learned early on that compromise is key as well as picking your battles! We also made "rules" together. These were not to tell each other what to do, but to pick important issues we felt needed to be addressed  with known expectations so that our marriage was not compromised. Anyway, I am rambling....point is marriage can be fun and awesome, but it is work and one person working on it while the other takes care of themself does not work. My last point is and I beg this(while I don't condone divorce)...do not stay together for the kids!  You can say what you will, but they know your dysfunction, they sense your stress, and your are modeling behavior that they will find appropriate in their marriages later on. OK.vent.over.